


'til i saw you in my thunderstorm

by colourmeblue



Series: you're my ocean, painted blue [6]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Day At The Beach, F/F, Fluff, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:55:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26339116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/colourmeblue/pseuds/colourmeblue
Summary: “It suits you.”A brief flicker of confusion crosses Yasha’s face. “What does?”Beau puts her hand up in front of her, gesturing around Yasha’s face and upper body. “Y’know... all of this.”Yasha smiles wider. Beau swears she sees a pink tinge to her cheeks.“Yeah.” Beau breathes. “That.”(Spoilers for E108.)
Relationships: Beauregard Lionett/Yasha
Series: you're my ocean, painted blue [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1595863
Comments: 23
Kudos: 382





	'til i saw you in my thunderstorm

Beau has found that things are a lot simpler when she’s in Nicodranas.

Sure, it’s closer to the war and all of their other problems than Rumblecusp was, but there’s something about the way the sun sets in Nicodranas. How the waves crash lightly on the shore. How the people here carry themselves. It could be a million miles away, for all Beau knows.

One of the reasons Beau likes being here so much is because it feels like her problems are temporarily washed away with the tide.

She’s lying back on a towel, eyes closed and hands behind her head. The Nein decided on a beach day with Yeza and Luc just after returning to Nicodranas. Marion had even stepped out for a brief moment to catch some sun, staying close by Jester’s side, before returning to the Lavish Chateau. 

Beau watches with a smile as Veth and Yeza chase Luc along the beach. She watches as Fjord blushes slightly when Jester compliments him on a sun hat Marion gave him to wear. She watches as Caleb rolls up his sleeves and settles down beside Caduceus with a book. Everyone seems fine. For the first time since, well, the last time they were here, Beau doesn’t feel the need to be on guard.

So she lies back, closes her eyes, and she doesn’t even know how much time passes as she soaks up the sun. Nobody bothers her. Caleb and Caduceus chat about random things, and every so often, Caleb will ask her a question that only requires a one word answer, and it’s nice. She doesn’t remember the last time she felt peaceful. Especially since restless has been her default for most of her life. 

Eventually, it becomes silent around her. She’s so relaxed that she’s not sure if she dozes off or not, or how long she’s been lying there. But she keeps her eyes closed, because she has no idea when she’s going to get another chance to relax like this. She could even pass it off as a form of meditation if she wanted to bullshit a little.

When she eventually does open her eyes, it’s Yasha that’s sitting beside her, staring out at the ocean. Beau’s a little taken aback, because she didn’t even hear her come over. Caleb and Caduceus are gone, across the beach now talking to Jester, who stands with her feet in the water.

The first thing Beau notices is that Yasha’s dripping wet. She’s not wearing her usual armour, instead opting for a sleeveless grey shirt, which Beau thinks is possibly the most distracting thing she could’ve possibly worn. Little droplets are falling from the white tips of her hair. She looks serene, and it’s completely disarming.

“Jester pushed me in. I forget how strong she is sometimes.”

“No… Yeah. She’s definitely… yeah.” Beau swallows. Things feel different now that she’s told Fjord about her feelings for Yasha. She’d kept them close to her chest for the entire time she’s known Yasha, and now that she’s revealed them to someone, she’s hyperaware of every single second that she’s with her. It’s as if Yasha is somehow aware of her feelings and now Beau feels like she’s even more vulnerable than before. 

But there are things she didn’t tell Fjord. Things that she still keeps locked away.

Like how meaning something to Yasha would make her incredibly special. To be chosen by someone after they’ve lost a wife  _ means  _ something. And Beau isn’t sure she’s ready to admit to herself that she  _ could _ be that something special to Yasha. She doesn’t know how she would handle that. How she would go about being who Yasha wants and needs without fucking all of it up. Without sabotaging it for herself and in turn, hurting Yasha.

Hurting Yasha is the last thing she ever wants to do.

She’d spent their last hours on Rumblecusp trying to gauge whether Yasha wanted to stay with them. It hadn’t occurred to Beau before that maybe Yasha wanted to go off on her own again. Maybe find her tribe. Maybe find  _ something _ she hadn’t found yet. Then, she received a verbal confirmation. Directly to her face. Yasha’s staying. Beau decided not to leave when she met the hag and now Yasha wants to stay. She doesn’t have to worry about losing her like that again.

Now they’re both here, on the beach in Beau’s favourite place, and all Beau can think about is how beautiful she is, framed by the sparkling ocean and beaming sunlight. A direct contrast to the night where she spotted her playing her harp with the moon and stars as her backdrop. She notices that she’s been staring this entire time, and tries to look away.

Beau’s a little more fixated than she was before. Maybe talking to Fjord and getting some reassurance gave her a tiny bit of confidence. They survived TravellerCon. Yasha is sticking around. Yasha  _ may _ like her. These are things she can work with, even if the thought gives her butterflies.

Butterflies. 

She hasn’t had those in a  _ long _ time. 

_ Fuck _ .

“Are you enjoying the sun?”

Yasha is looking at her with a raised eyebrow, as if she’s read every single thought Beau has had in the last minute. 

“Yeah.” Beau nods. “It’s nice to come back here and relax. I missed it.”

Yasha smiles and nods herself as she looks out at the waves. She almost looks out of place - a tall, dark, brooding barbarian sitting on the beach enjoying herself. It’s a sight that Beau likes more than she thought she would.

“What d’you think of the ocean?” Beau blurts out suddenly, causing Yasha to turn to look at her. Well, fuck. Now she just feels like an embarrassment. If this is how it’s going to be from now on, she should just see herself out right now.

“Uh…” Yasha frowns. “I mean…” 

“I just mean, uh…” Beau swallows before chuckling nervously. “I was just talking to Fjord the other day about, y’know, what we might want to do in the future. And really, I kinda just want to be out there. Sailing around with him as my captain. Maybe doing some Expositor shit along the way. I dunno.”

Yasha narrows her eyes, as if she’s studying Beau for a brief moment. “Well, I do like the ocean. It’s beautiful.”

“Yeah?” Beau can’t hide her grin. “I mean, there’s always a place for you on the ship. If you wanted it, I mean.”

Yasha smiles. “Well, I’m very good at fighting any lightning monsters that might come aboard.”

“Oh, yeah.” Beau nods enthusiastically. “Yeah, we might need protection from those. That’s a good plan.”

Yasha’s smile fades, glancing downwards. “You know, I meant what I said. I want to be wherever you guys are. And maybe… one day… if we do all split up… I would still like to be with someone. I feel like I just got back to you all, I… I don’t want to be alone.”

Beau’s gaze is even more intent than before, if possible. Well, fuck. Not wanting to be alone, that’s… Yeah. Beau feels that on a multitude of levels. “You don’t have to be.” While she offers a smile, she’s as serious as she possibly can be. She doesn’t want to force Yasha into anything, but if Yasha wants to stay with  _ her _ , then she will embrace that with open arms. Even Yasha sitting down next to her like this… she loves every moment. Things are a little better now that she’s finally acknowledged  _ why _ that is. “But… I’m glad you’re staying.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I would’ve understood if you wanted to go find your tribe, but… you belong here with us. And, y’know… if you ever do decide you want to find them, you don’t have to do it alone.”

Yasha’s gaze lingers on her. “I wouldn’t ask any of you to go back to Xhorhas with me. Especially with… Caleb wanting to go back to the Empire so badly. There’s nothing in Xhorhas for any of you.”

Beau shakes her head. “You’re not asking, we’re offering.  _ I’m _ offering.” Honestly, if it wasn’t so dangerous, she’d be happy to go with just the two of them. But she’s smart enough to know that traversing through the wastes of Xhorhas looking for a tribe of warriors that wanted to kill Yasha isn’t something two people can do alone. “It doesn’t have to be soon, or even at all. I just don’t want you to think that the option isn’t there just because we’re focusing on other things.”

“Beau…” Yasha’s eyes drop a little, and Beau can see the faint hint of a smile. She’s beautiful in a way that Beau will never properly understand. “Thank you.”

The words cause Beau’s heart to surge a little more than she anticipated, and she swallows again. Before she can say anything else, Yasha speaks up again.

“You know, Beau… I actually came over here for a reason.”

Beau’s eyebrows furrow together. “Oh, yeah?” A small part of her instantly begins to panic, because she sounds serious, and she’s not sure she wants to hear whatever it is. She’s had a total of two days to come to terms with the fact that she revealed the feelings she’s been harbouring for Yasha for nine months  _ out loud _ . In her eyes, that’s enough anxiety for a long time.

“Yeah. Actually… I made a bet with Jester.” The serious expression on Yasha’s face quickly fades as she leans over. In the split second between, Beau freezes completely, feeling her entire body flush.  _ What the fuck is she doing? _ It only takes a second for her to realise what’s happening as Yasha scoops her entire body up with ease, casually throwing Beau over her shoulder.

Confusion, elation and  _ relief _ hit her all at once. She’s not ready for whatever she thought was about to happen. Not yet. If anything, she is more than happy to be carried over Yasha’s shoulder for… whatever the hell this is supposed to be. She can hear Veth, Caleb and Fjord making various cheering sounds behind her and she just shrugs, because if anything, she’s enjoying this.

Beau lets Yasha carry her all the way to the water with a light jog before she wades in and unceremoniously tosses her in with ridiculous ease.

“What the hell, Yasha?” Beau hears Jester’s voice as she breaks the surface of the water.

“What?” Yasha’s facing away from Beau, but she  _ sounds _ smug. “You didn’t say  _ how _ to get her to come in the water.”

Beau spits out some water before wiping her eyes. “Your bet was get me in the water,” she deadpans with a laugh as she looks up at Yasha. Beau makes a note to teach Jester and Yasha a thing or two about what a good bet is. “You could’ve just asked me and I would’ve come.” She would do just about anything Yasha told her to, not that she would say  _ that _ out loud. At least, not right now.

“This way was much more fun.” Yasha turns around and holds her hand out. “Right?”

“Sure.” Beau can only laugh, because she doesn’t know what to do with this ridiculously charming and carefree Yasha, but she never wants this version of her to go away. Especially one that is sleeveless, soaking wet and bathed in sunlight. She doesn’t know if it’s Yasha’s celestial heritage or  _ what _ , but there’s an otherworldly quality to her that Beau is never truly prepared for. Something that’s drawn her in since the day they met.

Taking her hand, she lets Yasha pull her up onto her feet. Once she’s standing, Beau feels the breath leave her again as she stands in front of her. The light is reflecting in Yasha’s eyes and it’s immediately distracting.

“It suits you.”

A brief flicker of confusion crosses Yasha’s face. “What does?”

Beau puts her hand up in front of her, gesturing around Yasha’s face and upper body. “Y’know… all of this.”

Yasha smiles wider. Beau swears she sees a pink tinge to her cheeks.

“Yeah.” Beau breathes. “That.”

_ Well. Yeah. _ Beau’s pretty sure she’s in love with this woman. That much has hit her like a warhammer to the chest. She’d kiss her right now if they were alone and she had any ounce of bravery in this situation. Then again, she thought about kissing her on the cliff after their flight as well. She’s thought about doing it a lot the past week.

The moment passes as Yasha starts to turn around in a move to get out of the water.

“Wait, Yasha.”

Yasha pauses and turns back towards her again.

“Do you wanna… do something later?” It flies out of Beau’s mouth before she has a moment to think about how to word it properly. “I kinda want to go exploring a bit.” They really only know the smallest portion of this city that the both of them love, and she absolutely wants more one-on-one time with Yasha. It’s win-win, really.

Yasha’s lips twitch upwards in a smile once again. “Yeah… okay.”

“Okay.” Beau tries to ignore how goofy the smile on her face probably looks. “Great. Yeah. Sounds good.”

Beau stands in the water for a moment longer, attempting to rid herself of any nerves as she watches Yasha join the others on the shore. And she watches. For an embarrassing amount of time.

If Nicodranas wasn’t her favourite place in Exandria before, it most certainly is now.

**Author's Note:**

> How we feelin', Beauyashas?


End file.
